Breaking up with a guy can be hard to pull off, especially if it’s someone you have been in a relationship with for a long time.
That’s why it’s necessary to handle a breakup delicately and in a mature way. If you are looking for a mature way to let a guy down without shattering his feelings, here are some guides to follow to make it easy for both parties.
Break Up With Him In Person
Break ups should be done face to face and not with the help of modern technology. In this age when almost every communication is done over the internet, it could be tempting to end things via a short message. But the truth is you owe him a bit of respect. He might have a few questions for you, and it is better you close the issue once and for all.
Break Up In A Private Place
Some ladies think the best way to let a guy down is by doing the deed in a public place like a restaurant so that their boyfriend will not get emotional. Your partner deserves a bit of privacy after getting the sad news, so the best place to do this will be at a private place or at least an area he considers a comfort zone.
Don’t Give False Hope
Some ladies might want to tell their partner what he intends to hear in a bid to be polite. However, you ought to tell the whole truth in order not to give him any false hope that you two might get back together. If you take your stand, he will see things clearly and be able to move on.
Hit The Nail On The Head
When it comes to breaking up with a guy, you shouldn’t dilly-dally around issues. The appropriate way is to sit him down and state exactly what is on your mind. Go straight to the breakup conversation as soon as you meet up with the person. Get the situation over with as soon as you can and then move on.
Let Him Hear It From You And You Alone
Most of the time, most ladies are in the habit of confiding in friends or family members before they break up with a guy. Nothing is wrong with this, but make sure that you are speaking with the right people.
If you talk about the situation too often before you let him know, chances are that word will eventually get back to him, which will not only be hurtful, but also awkward. If you’re thinking about ending your relationship, your partner deserves to hear it from you, not from strangers.
Don’t Play The Blame Game
After you have told him you want to end things, do not make it look as if it is his entire fault. As an adult, you are expected to take responsibility for your actions and own up to your own shortcomings too. He will already be upset about the breakup, so don’t make things more difficult by listing all his negative qualities. Not that you are not allowed to point them out, you can, but be cool about it.
Don’t Ask For A Break
Don’t start your breakup tale by saying that you need a break or some space, say exactly what you want. Suggesting that you want to go on a break may keep his hopes high that there may be a chance of reconnecting back.
Don’t Back Down At The Last Minute
If you have made up your mind that you want to end things with your partner, be firm about it and do not allow anyone to change your mind. You need to be strong and stand your ground. If you back out of the breakup, chances are you’re only going to have to try to break up with them again much later.
Do All You Can To Avoid Conflict
Not everyone knows how to take a breakup well. Make sure that you do your part in passing on the message in the most peaceful manner. Even if he wants to pick up a fight as a result of being scorned, the best thing to do is to leave the scene.
Don’t Act On Impulse
Breaking up with someone should be an action that has been well thought out, not an decision that should be taken impulsively. It will be totally unwise to break up with someone and then, later on, wish you hadn’t taken that decision.
Show Some Respect
When you are about to end things with someone, one important thing to bear in mind is the need to be respectful. There is no need to be crass about things. It will be nice if when he goes over things much later, he will remember that you let him down with some dignity.
Keep A Few Days Distance
It is advisable to keep a safe distance from your partner before the day you decide to break up. This will help you to gain some emotional distance so that you will have time to come up with a good “speech.” Also, your partner might sense that something is wrong and this will make him be prepared.
Know What To Say And How To Say It
It is important you have your words ready before you met up with him you have to know what to say in advance. You know the kind of person your partner is, so you should also know the kind of words to use when breaking up with him. No matter how he reacts, it is advisable you stay calm all through.
Do Not Be Aloof
Always be clear about what you want when communicating your message. The clearer you are, the better and easier it is for the both of you. You might feel the urge to ease the pain by saying something he wants to hear, but the disadvantage of this is if you are not firm, he might think that there is still hope.
Leave Room For Closure
When you break up with someone, if he hasn’t been expecting it before, he might be in a state of shock for a few days. So he might need some time to heal and understand the whole situation. If he contacts you and asks for further explanation, be graceful about it, but be careful here, so that you do not give false hope of getting back together.
Now you have a list of 15 steps showing how to break up with someone. Follow these steps, and you will see that you won’t feel that much guilt when you take the bold step of ending an unfruitful or bad relationship.